Guatemala...

Unique and Beautiful

You will be hard pressed to find another country that offers so much in such a small space at such a low price. About the area of Tennesse, Guat. contains 27 volcanoes and more different styles of dress and dialects than you can shake a stick at. It is the most "Indian" of Central American countries and vies with Bolivia and Peru for that title for the hemisphere. You can hop on a chicken bus, pay a dollar or two, and find yourself in an hour in a place where the locals dress and speak different than your last stop. You can go from just about any place in the country to any other within a day...two tops if coming from or going to really remote highland areas. Climate varies from cool..even nippy highlands to sweltering jungles.

Names

Doesn't take long to see that many towns..especially in the highlands have long names. The root "tenango" means essentially the place of. In common speech...especially when dealing with chicken buses...it is dropped. Hence you hear folks talk about going to Huehue or Chichi. Quetzaltenango is not so abbreviated. Instead it is known as Xela. Panajachel...often called Pana... earned in the '60s the nickname Gringotenango.

Safety

This is the number one question. Way over hyped. I’ve been going to Guatemala since the 70’s. Even with the current economic and political issues it is still a lot better than back a couple decades. You do all the common sense stuff listed in the Lonely Planet guide…it increasing reads like it is written by someone’s grandmother…lawyers must do the editing. Some paranoia is worth while…prefer mine to be drug induced. Here are the don’t do its:

Don’t hike between villages around Lake Atitlan. Too many spots where folks can watch you coming and make sure no one else is around. There have been well documented robberies and rapes.

Don’t go up a volcano alone. Tours are cheap and they have some kind of guard.

In Antigua don’t walk to the cemetery or to the cross alone. The tourist police have set times they will escort folks up. Usually a good group is rounded up.

Also in Antigua…think twice about walking alone late at night…especially more than a couple blocks from the Plaza. That is just common sense but I was surprised where the language schools placed some lone females.

Last Antigua warning…seems to be the trendy thing for young gringa girls to pick up Guat. guys in the Plaza. This is especially popular on weekends when the Guat. city boys drive in. For the price of buying him a few drinks and a meal or two you get to brag back home about your Latin boyfriend. Just so you don’t think it’s love…he will be back for someone else the next weekend. If you are not looking to get laid, realize that he is. “No” doesn’t always translate. Hang out in public places. Don’t climb into his car if getting into the back seat isn’t on the menu. Met some girls who thought they were just driving to another part of town when they suddenly found the car heading out of town. One of them went totally psycho which scared the guys into taking them back. I know this paragraph will be totally ignored…just don’t complain.

BTW...I am constantly amazed/amused at the number of people who are oblivious that they are in a risky situation. Latin American travel as a backpacker is not a trip to Disneyland or an all inclusive resort. Don't count on lawyers or cops and especially your embassy to protect you.

When I was in training on one of my favorite Caribbean isles they emphasized situational awareness as being a primary means of defense. Don't let the other guy get the drop on you. What do you do if someone comes at you? Probably not what I do. Remember..the bad guy wants some cash fast. No philosophical debates over why he is doing this for a living. Neither Jesus nor Maximon is gonna pull your nuts outta the fire. Though I do make an offering to Maximon whenever in Santiago Atitlan. But I also always carry a Gerber Applegate combat knife. I'm that guy you see strolling down the street with one hand is his pocket. Have I had to use it? Sure...last time was in Lima. Three guys jumped me late at night in a bad neighborhood. Two ran away. One wasn't able to. No, you shouldn't go to those neighborhoods. I've always lived by that great line in the novel "Huasipungos" by Jorge Icaza..."Indians don't cost much".

Biggest mistake travelers to Guat make is to get all anal about bus schedules and bus company websites. Except for Tica Bus, Hedman Alas and a couple other internationals ain't no such critters. For the vast majority of the couple thousand buses on the road at any given time there are no websites, no schedules and no brakes. These are the chicken buses...either old US school buses or built by the Blue Bird bus company which does school buses too. They just cram in a few extra rows of seats and weld a roof rack on. The bus leaves when the driver wakes up, finishes eating and says goodbye to his mistress. The automated baggage system is the scrawny kid working as the bus driver's assistant. He climbs all over the outside of the bus as it carrooms down the road. He also sells tickets and makes change...don't worry..he remembers who has paid and who has change coming. If you gotta change buses...just be sure someone knows where you want to go. They will hand you off. Never fails.

Almost all buses run only during the day. Exception is the Guat. City to Flores/Santa Elena run. Night bus is safe and saves you a hotel. If you are in remote villages you might find that the only bus out leaves ungodly early...like 4am. Indians heading into bigger towns...almost always on business...like to get there, get done, and then get home same day. Most can't afford overnight stays in a hotel.

So what if you don't want to take a chicken bus? Longer distances many bus companies run the equivalent of old Greyhounds. You get a seat, no livestock. No potties...but they all seem to make potty stops. Except for the run to Flores/Santa Elena no ride is super long. Higher end is dominated by Ticabus... international.. Hedman Alas and Linea Dorada. For internal trips I personally think they are overpriced. As of Jan. 2007 government policy is to move all bus companies that service othere towns out to the edge. Eventual goal is to have a centralized bus terminal or two along the lines of Mexico City. Expect constant changes.

Your other option is to take a shuttle van through a travel agency. This is the best way to get from the airport to Antigua. Some outfits have realized that there is a market on some runs for a better than chicken bus service..but cheaper than the luxury lines. Most notable..the morning pullman run by Tranportes Rebuli from Antigua to Pana. Also...a van service goes from Antigua to Copan. Used to be Monarcas but they folded. Also a van runs from Antigua to San Cristobal for around $60. But it will get you there in one day. Something that you gotta be lucky and catch all the connections just so to do by regular bus. The bigger agencies were putting together fairly frequent runs elsewhere and of course all will offer a private shuttle at high rates. Gradually, the system is evolving. A cooperative of vans is slowly growing. Folks are pooling vans, passengers, expenses and profits to offer regular service on a growing number of routes. Using cell phones they are connecting the vans to exchange passengers. Example, I took a day trip from Antigua to Chichi. Normal leave time from Chichi is 2pm but I was conducting business and needed more time. There was a van leaving Chichi for Xela at 4pm. They called their van going from Pana to Antigua as the two were scheduled to pass through Los Encuentros at about the same time and I was able to switch. No fancy computer system needed...though who knows...maybe one will be instituted at some point. The knitting together of van routes will no doubt be without a lot of rhyme or reason at first but seems a logical outcome. For the forseeable future just post your questions on line. No centralized schedules yet...but that too will come. At least the options are growing.

Important centers...there are three main crossroads in Guatemala. Cuatro Caminos...turn off from the Panamericana to Xela. Los Encuentros...stop on the Panamericana where you can snag a bus down to Lake Atitlan or up to Chichicastenango. Lastly, Rio Hondo...Panamericana splits to go up to Rio Dulce and the Peten or down to Copan. Getting off at anyone of these will let you soon get a connection. Lots of snack vendors. In fact they are turning into small towns. Just watch your bag...really very safe.

Flying...only two airports in the country...Guat. City and Flores/Santa Elena. You see a plane coming down elsewhere he is probably a drug runner using a straight stretch of highway.

Costs

I´ve spent some time in Antigua talking to folks who seem surprised at costs in Antigua. They were expecting cheaper. Having been coming since the ´70s maybe I can put stuff in perspective...and give the odd tip.

The days of the 50 cent hotel room and filling up on the street with avocados and tamales for 25 cents are gone. But you can still have a cheap trip. Trouble in large part is rising expectations on the part of travelers. Way back when hot water was something you hoped to find at least monthly. 24 hr. water was itself a treat. Stayed at one of those 50 cent places in San Pedro where water ran from 5am to 7am...and that was considered a fancy place. Cheapest room I´ve seen advertised in Antigua is Q35...$4.40..that is a hostal called the Jungle Party. 6 Ave. Norte number 20. Know nothing more beyond that. Cruise 5 and 6 Calles Poniente and some of the little streets off them for cheapies. You can probably score for $5. Walk away from the tourist area for cheap unnamed comedors. Market is cheap too...though the stalls can be funky. Seen almuerzos in the tourist places for Q15. Hit the market for bread and fruit. Remember that eating like a gringo runs up prices. Tofu and decent cheese are still not part of the local cuisine. I don´t spend $1.25 at the Cafe Condessa but walk over to the Tostaduria Antigua and get a cup of the best coffee in town for Q4.

I carry the latest LP Guat. Like the organization. But they are tending to give the most space to the spots that are popular. Plus listing places that in the past no backpacker would consider...and can´t imagine any now. Posada Angel is $200US a night. I don´t care if Clinton did sleep there...he sure didn´t do anything..he was traveling with Hilary. That is page space that could be given over to cheapies.

As to the cheapies...they have been upgrading. Hot water, free drinking water(well worth it), even coffee and internet. So the value is still there.

For someone whose salary is based in the US or Europe these days are probably as relatively as cheap or cheaper than 20 years ago.

By the way...most of these folks with an issue with prices have no problem sitting at a bar for a couple hours. I wonder how many folks run a bigger bar tab than food bill.

It´s all obviously a lot cheaper than home. I can splurge on a great steak dinner in Antigua for $13. Place down the street from my La Quinta home runs $100.

Working

Yeh...you can teach English...but you gotta live in a hovel. Unless you get private work in Guat. City with business men. But who wants to do that? Bar work...in the past if you were young, female and could wiggle it that was pretty easy. Not seeing nearly as much of such employment as in the past. I think it had something to do with the Macondo mess. But...the Rainbow Cafe often hires. Good place to work. The Funky Monkey internet...same building as the Mono Loco...employs travelers..including cute females. Overall...it´s better to work an extra month or so at home. I´ve worked on the road in decades past...but things were cheaper then and opportunities were more interesting. That's what peace does.

Shopping

Guatemala is the best place to shop for handicrafts in all Central America. I'll point out some stuff in the sections on individual towns. Most towns have a day set aside as a market day. Try to plan your visits on those days. Even if not shopping you will find these to be the most active and colorful times.

Guatemala makes some of the world's best rum...in one of the country's dirtiest towns..Zacapa. The best stuff...in a straw wrapped bottle...is 27 years old. Sip like cognac. Best place to buy it is the duty free at the airport. Zacapa also makes good cigars. Plus you can buy Cuban cigars.